Have you ever felt betrayed as if your best friend stabbed you in the back? Or have you ever felt isolated and alone as if you were in the middle of nowhere without a cell signal?
One year ago, in the early morning, I felt inconceivably betrayed and isolated by one email. My peaceful and quiet morning was shattered as if a dropped wine glass broke into small pieces all over the floor. I felt numb from my head to my toes. I momentarily lost all my senses — I could not smell, I could not see, and I could not taste. I did not know what to do.
That email was sent from my company — a place where I truly had enjoyed working for 16 years. It said that my job was being eliminated effective immediately.
Layoffs.
Up until I received that email, I thought that layoffs were meant for someone else. I didn’t feel that I had to worry about it. To me, layoffs were not relevant to my life at all.
Let go, impacted, or affected… no matter how people try to describe “laid off” politely, indirectly or euphemistically, it simply meant that I did not have a job any more.
After the layoff notice, I spent the first weekend in a confused state — all kinds of mixed emotions ebbed and flowed through me — sometimes frustration, sometimes fury, sometimes embarrassment, sometimes insecurity, and sometimes disbelief.
Then, a voice in my mind hit me like a bolt of lightning. It said,
“Lois, you were planning to explore a new job in a couple of years anyway. Leaving a high-paying job might not be as easy as you think. So, you should appreciate that your company has decided that for you. Now, you can do whatever you always wanted to do outside the corporate world!”
This revelation was a turnaround from a bottomless abyss of exasperation to a place full of joy, and it re-energized me. Then, I started a so-called “gap year” project with a goal to meet 10,000 people. To do this, I wrote up a list of about 10 jobs which I had always wanted to do and other things I wanted to experience for myself. I always desired to meet people with diverse backgrounds and stories, and I always wanted to work at a different place than a big corporation. My list quickly became full of things like working at a Trader Joe’s, a Starbucks, a bar, a bookstore, a library, or working as a pet sitter, etc.
As a person who is always biased to action — and this time was no exception — I immediately started taking steps to achieve my new plans. In the first week after receiving the laid off notice, I applied to Trader Joe’s and started working there. About two weeks later, I started driving people for Lyft. Then, I started working at Starbucks as a barista. Additionally, from time to time, on an ad-hoc basis, I also provided pet sitting services.
Jimmy (pseudonym).
He is one of the many people I have met while driving for Lyft. He was a college football coach. One day, a randomly bounced ball hit Jimmy in the eye area seriously, and he needed urgent surgery. This accident happened in the early days of the COVID pandemic, and every surgery including his was canceled. Since he lost the critical time for an operation, he lost his vision completely. Now, he is totally blind. At first, he could not accept it, and he fell into deep despair. Soon, he realized that being frustrated would not change anything. He remembered what he had always told his players, “If you cannot change the situation, then change yourself.” Thus, following his own advice, he started learning how to walk with a cane, and he is now able to walk on his own.
His heart-aching but inspiring story is one of many anecdotes I have heard during this project. They have made my life much more rich and intriguing. As a result, I have become a storyteller with innumerable heart-moving stories to share. I am keeping journals about what I have experienced, and I have published a book.
Not long after I was laid off, I made a typo in an email to a friend. Instead of saying “I am one of the layoffs”, I typed, “I am one of the Playoffs.” (haha!) But you know what? I genuinely feel like I am advancing in one of the NFL or NBA Playoffs. Between Layoffs and Playoffs, the only difference was a mistyped P, but that P means to me Perseverance, Passion, and Pleasure. Oh, three more things starting with P have become very relevant to me these days— Pistachio latte from Starbucks, Peanut Butter Cups from Trader Joe’s and Passengers with five stars.
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